How To Injure Your Shoulder
So today, I’m going to do something a bit different and tell you about 3 ways to injure and abuse your shoulder. I’ve been giving too much helpful advice; it is time to give some not-so helpful advice to switch things up a bit. I’ve had enough of pretending the world is full of golden paved roads and puppies.
DO ONLY SHOULDER SHRUGS AT THE GYM FOR UPPER TRAPS AND FORGET THE LOWER TRAPS
If you are a glutton for punishment, I recommend only working out your upper trapezius muscles at the gym and forgetting your lower trapezius. Most people don’t even KNOW that you HAVE a lower trapezius, so fuh-get-a-bout-it! By doing shoulder shrugs and only working out your upper traps, you are creating a great muscular imbalance. Your upper traps help to elevate and also assist serratus anterior in upwardly rotating your scapulae, or shoulder blades. Your lower traps help hold the shoulder blades against your ribcage and also prevent the upper traps from elevating the scapulae too much while raising your arms over your head.
So logically, by only focusing on your upper traps and neglecting your lower traps, you are causing a muscular imbalance that can lead to shoulder pain, impingement and instability. This is an AMAZING first step towards abusing your shoulders.
ONLY BENCH PRESS AND FORGET ABOUT BACK EXERCISES AND STRETCHING YOUR CHEST
I see a lot of people walking around with hunched over shoulders. These people are on the right path cause I can tell they have a well developed chest with an admirable hunched over posture. Quazimoto of Notre-Dam himself would be blushing seeing some of these people.
Only bench pressing and neglecting your back is an amazing way to develop muscular imbalances, which is exactly what you are looking for here! By only focusing on the bench, you are overdeveloping your pecs and developing rounded shoulders. This is great because it impinges your shoulder and can lead to bursitis, rotator cuff injuries and tendonitis. To make sure those rounded shoulders don’t go away, be sure to NOT stretch. Stretching may get you out of your rounded posture, the last thing you want.
The pec minor is another muscle that will get tight from only doing bench presses. This will be awesome for you because the pec minor as it gets tighter and tighter will tip your shoulder blades forward, eventually causing your shoulder blades to look like a couple of bird wings sticking out back. You will be the envy of all your friends!
Make sure you don’t work out your back either! That is a HUGE no no! If you work out your back muscles like lats, middle traps and rhomboids, this may counteract all your hard work and cause your chest and back to balance out. This is absolutely unacceptable!
SIT AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE, ALL DAY AND EVERY DAY!
I see a TON of people doing this correctly each day and they have so much experience at it they pretty much deserve the title of Sit-Ninja or maybe Sensei of the Sofa. Make sure to round those shoulders too. This will get you to your goals because by sitting and rounding your shoulders, you are tightening up pectoralis major and minor muscles. This will encourage you to round those shoulders more! Having tight pecs will inhibit back muscles like the lats, middle traps and will make your serratus anterior inhibited and weaker, causing your shoulder blades to start coming off your rib cage and wing! So remember, whenever you are sitting, hunch over and HOLD that position for long periods of time. If you can hold the position for 3 hours straight, reward yourself with a triple thick chocolate milkshake from McDonalds….You deserve it!
So basically, if you love to abuse yourself and all pain is your pleasure, follow the above advice given…and whatever you do, stay away from this page where I teach you about the Rotator Cuff and how to strengthen it, as that will only help you! Remember, muscular imbalances and sitting are your allies, so make full use of them and you will soon be on your way towards abusing your shoulders.